What a Bachelorette Archetype and Mindset can Teach You
The views in these newsletters are from my own experiences and learnings and are focused on practical insights and actional tips for creating meaning and purpose in work and life.
This newsletter is not intended to be a judgment of any one person or style. These are just my observations. They may trigger experiences for you.
The Bachelor Dating Process Reminds Me of the Hiring Process
The “Bachelor” franchise is a real-life show where one bachelor or bachelorette dates many people at the same time. The goal is to be engaged with the one true love at the end of the show.
It reminds me of interviewing many candidates (job seekers) for one job. At the end of the five dates (interviews), you are married to the new hire.
Yes, I Watch the Bachelor/Bachelorette
Yes, I admit it, I watch the Bachelor/Bachelorette shows, although, I’m really a channel flipper. I am a romantic and I believe love can come from anywhere and/or at first sight. I enjoy watching the personal dynamics and the psychology of these dating experiences.
Two Instead of One
The Bachelorette franchise is trying something different this season. They have two very lovely women vying for some 40 men. Normally there is only one woman dating all of these men. I had a very sneaky suspicion that there would be tension in the house. And I am proving myself right, but not for the reason that I had assumed.
I had made an assumption that the women, who are friends from a previous show, would be competitive with each other. That’s not what I perceive to be true. However, there is tension.
The Tension is with Self
Have you ever been in a group interview where many candidates are in the interview room at the same time, answering the same questions, in front of the hiring manager and team? Or have you ever been on a team at work or in sports where you felt insecure, competitive, or not enough?
The Bachelorette Competition
What I’m noticing in watching the Bachelorette is that the competition that Bachelorette #2 (B#2) is feeling and acting out on is not with the other Bachelorette, but with herself.
What I mean is, in my observation, B#2 is acting out as a victim archetype; crying and whining that the guys don’t like her, that they are not there for her, and that they don’t pay enough attention to her.
Lots of Drama
Each week it’s the same drama with B#2. The camera shows her crying, laying on the couch, and fighting with herself about how she is not wanted and that she wants to quit the show. She often cancels the ‘get-together’ party right before the rose ceremonies, missing out on opportunities to connect with the guys that are there for her. She seems to be focused on the guys that are leaving or that she sends home and is not present with the guys in the room who are there for her.
Become Aware
Many people are not aware of themselves; their thoughts, actions, and effects on others, just like B#2 appears. There are many ways to become self-aware. I think that B#2 will quickly see how she is showing up when she watches the TV show. Here are other ways to become aware:
Watch yourself — in order to do this, you need to know that you have an ego (the mind creating the drama and essence — the thing doing the watching — read this newsletter for more information on ego and essence).
· Breathe.
· Empty your mind.
· Meditate.
· Sit in stillness.
· Walk in the woods.
· Ask others questions about you.
Change the Mindset
I listen to a podcast called Hidden Brain by the exceptional host, Shankar Vedantam of NPR. He recently had psychologist Alia Crum on his show. She shares that we often assume that we see ourselves and the world around us accurately but that our perceptions are always filtered through our mindsets — and these mindsets shape our lives in subtle but profound ways. Alia explains how mindsets affect our response to stress. She provides excellent examples of how her mindset hindered and helped her achieve success when she played hockey at Harvard. Click the video below and listen to the two-part podcast series.
https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/reframing-your-reality-part-1/id1028908750?i=1000570374292
https://hiddenbrain.org/podcast/reframing-your-reality-part-2/
https://hiddenbrain.org/podcast/you-2-0-befriending-your-inner-voice/
Check-in With Yourself
Perhaps it’s time to check in with yourself. Are you a victim, drama queen/king, too focused on yourself, and missing the opportunities right in front of you? Are you competing against yourself? Carolyn Myss, a five-time New York Times bestselling author and internationally renowned speaker in the fields of human consciousness, archetypes, spirituality and mysticism, health, energy medicine, and the science of medical intuition has a test to help you determine your archetypes. Which ones are you? Maybe you’d like to change your mindset — you can, it’s up to you. Review this list of archetypes and be honest with yourself. Which ones are you?
Maybe you’d like to change your mindset — you can, it’s up to you.
The real you matters,
Anne
Anne Pryor is the creator of Lovitude™ a Soul Painter, and a LinkedIn Expert. As a recognized top international LinkedIn Authority, she motivates audiences to action during her presentation sharing the best tips and techniques for creating branded and search engine optimized LinkedIn profiles for thought leaders, sales, business professionals, and job seekers to achieve their goals.
LinkedIn Keynote speaker presentations include the National Association of Black Journalists, Project Management Institute, WBL, American Marketing Association, ACG, University of South Florida Black Students Association, Toyota Sponsored NABJ Inaugural Leadership Forum, GenesysWorks, Officenters, and hundreds of corporate, community, government events, and meetings.
As the creator of Lovitude and a Soul Painter, her paintings have been called ‘visual blessings and are hanging in Mayo Clinic, a Pulitzer Prize Winner’s home, in galleries, and licensed on products sold globally. She was a featured guest on the Hallmark Channel Home & Family Show, a keynote speaker and faculty on The Shift Network, and presenter at the International Association of Near-Death Studies (IANDS). She has presented at Mayo Clinic, Cargill, for corporate events, and demonstrates both online and in-person meetings.
She was inspired through after-death communications (ADC) with her friend to create vivid images to elucidate, awaken, and activate souls using ink, her breath, and essential oils, on plastic. Anne was not an artist before these messages, she now has 4,000 soul paintings. During her keynote speeches and presentations, she paints live for audiences and they are moved and in awe by the colorful and meaningful messages that she receives from the audience’s energy. Lovitude images are available for licensing. Images grace products sold globally and proceeds go to charity.
LOVITUDE SOUL PAINTER
When Paradise Speaks Book about Lovitude
Anne Pryor Lovitude Soul Painter on Hallmark Channel
The Shift Network Course — Unblock Your Creative Gifts with Help from Unseen Helpers
Order Best Selling Story When Paradise Speaks by Rise Severson Kasmirski
LINKEDIN SALES TRAINER AND COACH
LinkedIn Workshops by Anne Pryor
Anne Pryor Keynote Speakers Bio
Free Lovitude LinkedIn Backgrounds
Resources:
The highlighted areas of the text are links to authors, videos, books, and resources. In addition, here is a list of resources that I call upon to guide and advise me:
List of Books compiled by Bill Guggenheim, Anne Pryor, and Rise Kasmirski
Rise Severson Kasmirski, M.A., Mystic, Author, Teacher, Certified Coach, Speaker
Anne Pryor, M.A., Lovitude Soul Painting, Teacher, LinkedIn Expert, Speaker
Echo Bodine, Global Author, Medium, Spiritual Teacher, Speaker
Wes Hamilton, Master Numerologist, Speaker
Lori Palm, Creator Core Passion, Purpose Coach
